1:41 a.m. Indescribable leg pain has me wide awake. My hospice friends say the pain is most likely caused by tumors pressing on nerves in my legs and hips. Can't think of a better reason or time to blog, can you?
--This is my newest prized possession:
I am reading it cover-to-cover, music-nerd style. I have a long history with the hymnal, starting circa 1980, when I needed something to do to pass the time during the sermon. When I was growing up, before the giant screens hit Baptist churches all across the great South, we actually used the hymnal as part of the church service. In my growing-up hymnal, I knew that "Holy, Holy, Holy" was #2 and "Victory in Jesus" was #89. My new red hymnal is a little different, but I am having a fabulous time singing my heart out in bed (and yes, Kelvin, practicing the Hallelujah Chorus)! Smile.
--Campbell's advertises 32 feet of noodles in one can of their chicken noodle soup. This grosses me out so much! We will not be eating CNS at our house anytime soon.
--Baby: Mom, which super power would you rather have? Flying or web-slinging?
Me: Flying, for sure.
Baby: Me, too!!! (...happily skips away....)
--The weather lately has been crazy. I know it doesn't compare to my friends up north, but I am pretty tired of winter, and wish it away quickly. This little guy (given the name "Olaf", of course) turned up on the hood of my car last week with the latest snow/ice/stuff that fell from the sky.
--Baby has been on a roll lately. He makes me laugh like no other. This happened while he was working on his latest rainbow loom creation:
Goliath: How do you make that?
Baby: You'll understand when you're older.
--Later on today (much later), the Child Life Specialist that works for my hospice company is coming over for her first meeting with my cowboys. I've talked to her on the phone several times, and while I find her to be somewhat chatty, she's certainly pleasant enough. I hope the boys think so. I expect that their little guards will be WAY up, talking to a stranger about Mom's Sickness. It's a meeting that I think is necessary, but I'm not looking forward to it too much.
--
This is a little snapshot of my sweet nephew Truett. He's two months old now...isn't he great?!?
--Hubby's sister is on the countdown to her little one! My new niece should be here sometime in the next 3ish weeks...Audrey has been texting me pics of the adorable clothes, shoes, and nursery that is waiting for that sweet baby girl. The cuteness is almost more than I can handle. So excited!!!
--While we're on the subject of being an Auntie...
Seester is having another girl! Reese the Niece is going to be a big sister!
The cowboys opened their bank accounts, and they say "Thank You!"
--I think that Valentine's Day is a "holiday" that Hallmark made up to boost sales. It's silly, if you really think about it. We should be expressing our love for people each and every day! Before you go off thinking that I am a big V-Day grinch, you should know that each night this week I am writing on paper hearts something I like about each of my boys and hanging them on their bedroom doors. When they wake up in the mornings, they are eager to find their new heart and see what Mom really thinks of them!
--It's tough to make blogging interesting when I never go anywhere or do anything.
--Goliath attended his first Revo weekend (aka Disciple Now) a couple of weeks ago. I have had a hard time with the idea that I am old enough to have a kid who is old enough for Revo! DNow weekends were my favorite growing up!!! Well, except for that one year when my foot was run over by the car I was riding in for the scavenger hunt. That was a downer! I have been so excited for my little boy--who isn't so little anymore.
--I am worn out from my groaning.
All night long I flood my bed with weeping
and drench my couch with tears.
My eyes grow weak with sorrow;
they fail because of all my foes.
Away from me, all you who do evil,
for the Lord has heard my weeping.
The Lord has heard my cry for mercy;
the Lord accepts my prayer.
Psalm 6:6-9
--I am going to try to go back to bed now. Goodnight. I'll see you tomorrow!
13 comments:
You have a unique gift with your writing - you are always interesting and humorous and honest and inspiring and faithful. Praying for you, your cowboys, hubby, parents and friends continually.
I pray your pain eases and that you were able to get some rest last night. Also praying for healing in whatever way God wills it. (Of course, I'm STILL praying for Monster to be miraculously GONE!!!) Prayers for your cowboys--and your entire family. I love your writing and esp. your testimony--even during the hard times your eyes seek and find Jesus! God Bless you and yours.
My heart aches for you! I have been praying and just cry when I read your posts .I am trying to complain less over my silly problems. Your attitude is so inspirational. You have been a blessing to so many strangers I know!'
I pray that The Lord will give you a miracle but if not know that He has used you in at least one life (mine).
A man in our town was hit by a car and killed crossing the street to go to Bible study the other night. I don't know why I'm telling you that!
I guess we are all passing thru to our true home. You have done such an amazing job of letting your boys know how much they are loved. There are so many things I would like to tell you.. You have the same personality as my best friend who fought brain and breast cancer off and on for 15 years! I think she has beat the "monster", it was miserable and humiliating at times. I know you know! My brother was just diagnosed with Cancer, my 87 year old father is taking it hard. I guess he was sure he would out live his kids?? Now he has to face the possibility that's not true. I guess what Im just trying to say is that none of us knows the end of "our story" but know that God has this whole show of life orchestrated perfectly for those who love Him. Your story will end perfectly!! May God's peace be with you, your husband and the cowboys.
Thank you for sharing laughs and tears with all of us!!!
I don't know you, but I've read all of your blog entries because my cousin reposts them. I am keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers constantly. I pray that God will give your cowboys peace through this horrible senseless time. There really are no words, are there? But there are prayers, and I am praying them for all of you.
I am a church member with your Mom and Dad. You have a great gift of writing that describes so well what you have been through. I love the honesty with which you write and the inspiration it gives me. I have been praying much for your cowboys, your husband, and your family. I know all of this doesn't make sense, but God says his ways are not our ways. Whatever way he chooses will serve to make perfect his plan. I pray for peace, comfort, freedom from pain, and revelations of what God desires to show you each day to let you see His love for you. I have also been asking for prayer from Adult Bible study group and my Sunday morning class. May God be very close to you. I am still holding out hope that something will stop this monster somehow. We were so privileged to hear a wonderful testimony from your parents. I can see where the strength you have is rooted because of their deep love for the Lord. God Bless you in a very special way and be very near to you.
I will be praying.
Allyson, I had been praying for you and your family for a while because Sharon Boucher Shimshack had asked for prayer for her friend on facebook before I realized that I know you, too. I teach school in Denton and one of our ice days in December when I was bored I decided to read your blog. A ways into it I realized that who you are and it broke my heart. I read and cried for hours reading the entire blog. I don't know if you remember me, but I was at ORBC when you were. My daughter, Tricia, was your age. I will continue to pray for you and your family through the coming months and years. You are such a gifted writer and such an inspiring Christian as you continue to praise God through everything you are going through. I am close by if there is ever anything I can do for you or your family. Love and prayers
I don't know you but have been reading your blog. You have been such an inspiration to so many people, people who you don't even know. God is using you in ways you may never know. Love and prayers to you and your sweet family.
Ok, you can't tell us that your foot was run over one year at DNOW & then not tell us the rest of the story! :)
Praying fervently for you and your precious family, knowing that He who promises will be faithful. "The Lord gives His people strength. The Lord blesses them with peace." (Psalm 29:11) Praying you, your family, and especially your darling boys are overwhelmed with His strength and His peace this week.
Hi Allyson, This latest blog made me laugh. I thought I was the only one that memorized the hymnals forwards and backwards when I was a kid during the sermon. I feel like I have gotten to know you so well through your blogs. I know it's only one sided but we seem to be at least a little bit alike I have discovered. I have three kiddos also, only they are 10, 8 and 4 ( boy, girl,girl). I did the same thing for Valentine's Day only being the procrastinator that I am, instead of the daily hearts ( I forgot about my great idea until Feb. 10th)I stayed up until 1 o clock in the morning the night before so I could have the kids wake up and see all their 14 days of hearts on their door when they woke up with the things I had written on them about what I love about each of them. (did that make sense?) Anyway, I have been praying for you for a long time and continue to pray for you and your sweet family. You are such an inspiration and a great mom and I only wish I had known you longer and in person because I think we would have made great friends. :) I know your mom from Sugar Creek and I still remember the day that she told me about you and passed out the prayer bracelets.I still have mine. I think you are a brave young lady and a gifted writer and I will continue to lift you up before the throne of our Heavenly Father.
You are such a gift to your family, and for all of us, too, as your share your heart and your journey. My own mother has terminal cancer, but because of her's and the family's dysfunction, so much love has been, and will be lost. It warms my heart and inspires me to see you living life to the fullest, with even more memories, moments,legacy, and love than many other people have. You and your family are in my daily prayers.
Hi Allison, I'm so blessed to "meet" you as a couple of dear sisters in Christ have mentioned your journey to me. My prayers are covering you and your family today. Thank YOU for lifting my heart through your steadfast love of your family and our Heavenly Father. I am the founder of a ministry called Sacred Story (www.sacredstoryministries.org) which helps women have a voice to share about God's faithfulness. If you feel led, please do reach out.
Hi Allison, I have been reading your blog for only a short time, but I did go back and read the entire blog. I have pondered your triumphs, challenges, and hardships. So many times we have no control over our circumstances, just control over how we respond to them. You have responded in faith, and God has blessed you through family, friends, and strangers prayers you have never met.He continues to sustain you even through this painful trial. He is your constant. Praise God that you are his. Although I feel pain and empathy for you and your family, I also feel great joy for your spirit. One day we will all stand before God, and hope he says to us what he will say to you " Well done my good and faithful servant" I will continue to pray for you and your family.
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