Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Do's and Don'ts for the Chemo Room

In honor of my LAST day in the chemo room (!!!), I have put together a little list of do's and don'ts for basic etiquette. I tell the little cowboys all the time that manners matter...even in the chemo room. Here's what and what not to do.

1. DO mind your own business. We might have to share nurses, but my cancer is mine and your cancer is yours.

2. DO NOT ask me every time you see me if I've tried the peppermint-flavored water. Maybe I don't like peppermint. Or maybe I don't like water. Probably I'm running out of polite responses.

3. DO wear a nose strip if it keeps you from snoring while you nap.

4. DO NOT talk about nose hair. I do not want to hear about whether you have it or not, nor do I care to know whether blowing your nose is easier during allergy season if said nose hair has begun to grow back.

5. DO keep private information private. Just like sex, any conversation about bodily fluids and/or functions easily lends itself to a TMI label.

6. DO NOT offer to share your neck pillow or blanket with me. Ick.

7. DO NOT ask me about the specifics of my case. Chances are that I hate being here, and having to rehash the depressing details with a stranger only makes me hate it more.

8. DO cover your head. Chemotherapy is a beast, and we all know it. There is no need to flaunt what it has stolen from you, thereby reminding the rest of us what we have also lost.

9. DO NOT, under any circumstances, wear pajamas, a housecoat, your slippers, or a crown to the chemo room. No way can you keep your dignity if you do.

10. DO wear a bra. Please.

11. DO NOT say things like "These pole covers are so cute!" or "That was easy, wasn't it?" Nothing in the chemo room is cute or easy to deal with.

12. DO be very careful what you eat in the chemo room. Because Mexican food and chemotherapy don't mix.

5 comments:

Elliott said...

Mercy! Hopefully I won't have to utilize these rules in the future. So glad you are finished!

Elliott said...

Oh, the comment showed up as Elliott, but of course it's Shannon. :)

bhayes11 said...

Got it! Hope I don't need it. So glad you are done with that mean stuff!

The Horton Family said...

YIKES!

Valerie said...

Only someone who has been through chemo can truly appreciate your rules - so funny! My pet peeve was also people who wore pajamas - one lady truly wore bunny slippers. Yikes! Thank you so much for keeping your sense of humor and sharing it with your readers! Enjoy that beautiful new home. We just moved last month and a larger home is such a blessing.